A few years back (2013), there was a really excellent opinion column in the LA Times entitled “How not to say the wrong thing.” In it, the authors (Susan Silk and Barry Goldman) describe a system of concentric rings for modeling human relationships and the direction that support should flow in case of a tragedy or difficulty.
I think I started conceptualizing of it as “Silk Ring Theory” because of the URL; looking at the article now, both authors are credited in the byline. But “Silk” just stuck in my head.
In any case, it’s a really excellent essay with good advice on how to support your loved ones without increasing their burdens, while also receiving the support *you* need.
Emilybook 