Today I learned that this concept has a name – Burned Haystack. (I’ve heard of it before, but it didn’t have a name.)
Basically, the idea is to be as raw and honest and true as possible on your dating profile, so that you don’t waste time with incompatible people. It might take longer to find a person who meets your parameters, but they’ll be a better fit for your life and goals.
The metaphor is that if you’re looking for a needle in a haystack, it can be better to just set the hay on fire and then look for the needle in the ashes.
20+ years ago, advice columnist Carolyn Hax called hairy legs “a built-in doink filter.” I’ve always remembered that.
Emilybook 